Being Single is Scary

I think one of the most scariest relationship statues is “single”. Most women I know right now are in one sided relationships. In fact, I have never met a women or couple in my age range in a healthy relationship. Women I know (including myself) have always been in relationships where the women have to minimize themselves and be loved selfishly by a man but we will stick it through because it’s scary to be alone.

Alone in the sense of not being controlled because women who aren’t loved by fathers properly or ever, look for a father figure in their partners. So the red flags of being controlling and possessive are taken as pink flags of emotional security and “love”. If you’re in a relationship ask yourself, “would I be with him if I wasn’t afraid to be alone?” The answer may shake your reality but then answer this “what are you pretending not to know?” If you are single ask yourself, “Is this life better than the one you were pretending to be happy in?”

“Why are you single?” should never be a question posed to any Women. To live in your singleness should be a confirmation of emotional intelligence and internal strength. Nothing is more easy to do than settle, it’s so comfortable and predictable. If you are single and you feel “alone” affirm everyday who you are and what you deserve and never be jealous of relationships you don’t want. Before you can love anyone, you have to first love on to yourself and be the example of how you’re supposed to be treated by anyone in any area of your life. Why would he love you more than you love you?

by cashima major

My name is Cashima Major
I am 30 year old african american women
who loves writing poetry and inspirational pieces to empower other women and readers who can connect with my work.

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