Does My Marriage Need Therapy?

Marriage is a wonderful ride, but there is no denying how hard it can be at times. Couples who are married in their 20’s or 30’s may find themselves changing and growing into new versions of themselves throughout their marriage, presenting challenges to their partners.

Marriage therapy is less taboo than it was a decade ago. I know many couples who seek out a therapist prior to marriage to work out whatever issues they may be having.

A question that many couples ask is, but how do you know it’s time to seek out a marriage therapist? I think every couple is different, but there are a few telling signs that it may be time to workout whatever funk you two may be in.

  1. Constantly Fighting. If you can’t seem to go a day or two without fighting, it may indicate a breakdown of communication in your relationship. It could be a good opportunity to seek out a professional and figure out where the miscommunication is happening.
  2. One or both of you feel the distance. If you and/or your partner can feel the emotional distance and have tried to approach the subject with little to no success – it could be a sign of an underlying issue. Lack of emotional intimacy can detrimentally affect a relationship. It’s best not to let it go on too long.
  3. Infidelity. If someone in the relationship had an affair, it’s an excellent time to seek out a professional and make sure all wounds heal appropriately. A breakdown of trust in a relationship is a ticking time bomb; it could leave other casualties like children, relatives, friends if it ends up exploding.
  4. Extremely Controlling Behavior. If you think you are suffering from an overly controlling spouse and have had no success approaching the subject with said spouse – a therapist could help get to the root of the problem. Often an outside perspective can help bring light to the situation.
  5. Abusive behavior. Emotional or physical abuse is never okay. If you are experiencing either emotional and/or physical abuse I highly suggest you seek the help of authorities and a therapist. If the relationship is one you want to stay in, your partner can benefit from individual as well as marriage therapy. Abuse is not something to take lightly and please put your safety above all else.
  6. Excessive criticism. If one spouse is excessively criticizing the other spouse and it is having ramifications on other areas of the relationship – it may be a red flag that something underlying is bubbling.

This isn’t an exhaustive list and every single person’s situation is different. If you have a gut feeling that therapy is for you, I encourage you to check it out. First sessions are typically free and it is a good opportunity to see if this works for you and your spouse.

Additionally, many websites like, Regain.us, offer online counseling services to married couples. These can be done from the comfort of your own home and at any time.

How did you know it was time for you to seek marriage counseling? How did it positively or negatively affect your relationship? We would love to hear from you.

This article was sponsored by Regain.us an online marriage counseling resource. We are so thankful for the mental health companies that sponsor posts so we can share resources with our community.


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