Are you prone to holding onto emotional pain or grudges? Carrying past negative emotions can be highly toxic to our mental wellbeing. We can all put on a front and act perfectly fine, but what’s going on inside is what truly matters.
I always thought the “right” way to deal with negative emotions was to mask them with positive affirmations or thoughts, and even though that can help in the moment, quite often this is just a temporary fix or disguise because sooner or later our true feelings will arise again. Recently though, I discovered how meditation can help with healing emotional pain and why it is vital to address these underlying issues.
I always had a fear of being on my own. I HATED my own company and always needed others around me. Other people were a distraction to the negative thoughts, self-loathing and depression going on inside, but when people let me down, panic arose and all hell would break loose.
You see, the last week of 2017 didn’t turn out exactly how I had planned. My plan was to be with my closest loved ones, but my mum (my rock) was working and my boyfriend explained that he wanted some time to rest too. I immediately panicked. This meant the majority of the week was going to be spent on my own. Of course, I became anxious and all the emotions of being alone came to the surface again. What was I going to do?
The beginning of the week was awful; I wallowed in my own self-pity and felt completely lonely. I also tried to override my emotions, but the more and more I tried to suppress them, the more and more they screamed out louder.
What I didn’t realise was that I was alone for a reason. I had tried so damn hard to mask my feelings that the universe had decided enough was enough. I needed to face my fears, and I needed to acknowledge the pain in order to address any underlying issues and finally heal so that I would be comfortable on my own!
Constantly attaching myself to people was the act of looking outside of myself for happiness, when instead I should have been looking within.
This is when I discovered a meditation practice that I could use. Whilst I’m familiar with using meditation as a tool for being mindful, I had never used the practice to release emotions before. I was scared and nervous to tap into something I had tried to hide for so long, but I knew that in order to move on, it had to be done.
(This practice can be used for any type of emotional pain)
1. Find a quiet and safe place to practice
It’s important to find an area where you will not be disturbed. This is a time where you will be facing feelings that you may have suppressed for a long time so feeling safe during your practice is important. I choose to meditate in my room where I know I can shut the door and fully relax.
2. Acknowledge any physical pain or tension
When I thought about being alone I noticed that my chest area would tighten. My anxiety started to bubble in the mid area of my heart so I knew that this was the area I needed to focus on during my meditation.
You may feel discomfort in your stomach or in the same place as me! Becoming aware of where the emotion is harvesting in your body is the first step. Once you have pinpointed this area, then you are ready to start.
3. Allow yourself to feel
Close your eyes and bring your focus inwards by turning your attention towards your breath, notice as you inhale and exhale.
Once you feel comfortable and relaxed, focus on the part of your body where you feel the tension, resentment, pain or hurt residing. Allow yourself to breathe into the pain, be gentle with yourself as you explore and uncover hidden emotional depths, continue to do this until it slowly starts to diminish. You can do this for as long as it takes or as long as you want.
4. Embrace the relief
Once you feel a sense of relief and the pain is gone, inhale one last deep breath into the place where you felt pain and imagine a ball of white light emanating from this area, you are cleansed and now free from the emotional and physical burden that was residing in you.
Depending on the intensity of the pain, this may be a process that you need to repeat or you may release yourself in one session. Persevere with this practice and you will begin to heal in miraculous ways.
I am grateful to have been through such a tough week because without it, I would have never realised my unhealthy habit. I am now able to understand the importance of allowing myself to feel through pain. Only then was I able to let go of not being comfortable in my own company.
I realised that my true fear was the thought of being lonely and not fitting in, but when I looked into it, I am not lonely at all.
The rest of my week flowed with ease and I made the most of being on my own for once! The joy I feel now that I can say “I enjoyed being alone” is absolutely amazing.
Author: Kiarna Jayne
Author Bio: Kiarna Jayne is a UK blogger who has a massive passion for all things based on creative energy, positivity and self-development. She encourages her readers to express their authentic truth by sharing content that helps to awaken their true potential. Kiarna Jayne also enjoys meditating and exploring spirituality.
Link to social media or website: Instagram @kiaajayne | http://kiarnajayne.com/