Hey there! Your fellow habitual procrastinator and perfectionist here! Welcome to the chat. When I tell you 2019 has been a year of endless cycles of tapping into and out of my dreams, reaffirming and realigning weekly… sometimes daily.
I have a bad habit of shifting myself off my own path of success and expansion. Success for me looks like happiness and joy in all areas of my life. It has nothing to do with the amount of money and Gucci I will have. Although being in possession of those things are nice, I am working toward being fulfilled as a result of the calling I decided to answer and pursue.
That’s it. That’s all. However, sometimes I have a hard time seizing that desire and vision. I like tricking my mind by telling myself that happiness is too far for me to reach and grab at; therefore, I should give up. As a result of that, I stop setting goals, I stop reading my self-help books, I become less cheerful about new opportunities that propel me closer to my dreams, and my body starts shutting down—literally.
Physically, I start chilling in bed more, I begin scrolling on my phone for a huge chunk of hours a day again, and I start submitting to this cycle of comparison. These are just a few ways I can tell I am losing sight of what I want. Perfectionism is also a thief of growth for me. When I am striving for perfection, I am focused more on the validation and approval from other people.
I take a lot of hard hits from myself. To counteract what usually happens when I am working against myself, I start reshaping and molding. I have to ask God to send me a reminder of what I am working toward, and He usually provides me with a vision that I can’t unsee. I’m currently going through this right now for the millionth time. However, God has equipped me with some ways to release myself from what is crippling my vision and rise to the occasion.
Here are some ways you can begin affirming your truth instead of working against it:
Pray or seek who/what you place your faith in.
Baby, I am a woman who fights through the war of the mind with prayer. It’s reassuring and it’s the way God and I communicate. I immediately start receiving from God when I pray. There is nothing better than feeling yourself becoming realigned with what God has been affirming inside of you from the beginning. Do not feed into your crippling self-doubt.
Keep a supportive tribe around you.
Good friends and family members matter. In this season, I am less focused on having a whole bunch of people around me. I want a tribe of support, love and radiance around me. I am bound to discover love within myself by being influenced and encouraged by great people around me. Usually, a tribe is who is willing to pray and go to war with you. Comfort and solace can be found in knowing you are not alone. You are going to find your way. We all just need a little help sometimes.
I have this great friend in my life who has been teaching me a lot about meditation (I literally text him every blue moon to ask a couple ‘duh’ questions). Meditation can get you to center AND recenter yourself. It’s a great tool to refer to when you have that unsettling feeling going on within your body. It creates space and time for you to silence your mind and rest. I am still learning how to meditate. So… yeah.
Know that you are not perfect and affirm a positive shift over your life.
Write down affirmations 100 times if you need to, so you can get into the habit of the truth you are sitting in and speaking over your life. Affirm and ask for accountability. Know that you are human. Humans are multidimensional and multi-purposeful. You are going to feel powerless some days, and that is okay. Just keep committing yourself to small strides.