Love Without Words

Can you tell me how you define love? Maybe I’m the clueless one… I used to think love was a feeling where it’s given to you like a piece of candy. Little by little.. slowly and itsy-bitsy pieces are thought to make you happy. A miserable girl in a miserable world… that’s how I felt. I was a young girl who was toyed around for attention. He came to me with ‘I love yous’ and walked away…

We start building obsessions by forcing love to be given from the other person. The question of “do they love me” is an addiction. But, at the end of the day, they only wanted the attention. Attention makes people blind themselves and think it’s love. Love is not a crumb you get or the obsession of getting more from them.

If I had a chance to slap myself for all the times I put myself in a begging situation, I seriously would! We aren’t an option. We are a commitment! The option card was something I was pleased with… as long as he’s with me. As long as I get some form of love from him. But he wasn’t giving love. He was giving lust. Maybe my feelings were lust for an impossible love!

Love is a feeling you have for anyone or anything! I don’t want to sound materialistic, but buying a new item causes some form of excitement in our bodies. Materialistic happiness is a two second feeling of empowerment. We simply feel happier for making a happy decision. Happiness itself actually is a psychological effect!

Love has no bill or paycheck on how you are supposed to act and say. Love wants you to love. Love wants to show how much you care. Love has no punishments priced on it. Expectation and thoughts do!

Like I always say, the mind is sometimes our fake best friend that stabs our back. The mind does not want the best for us because we simply grew up with the idea of not being the best. We grew up with acting a certain way. We grew in stereotypes and gender roles. Because of your gender, you grew into wearing either pink or blue because our culture has labels. Would you ever see a baby boy wearing pink? Well maybe once in my entire life, but low chances.

You might ask yourselves, “why the hell did she write paragraphs of nonsense, when her pet is on the cover of this article?” Well, my bunny best friend is the definition of love. She is just a tiny creature who gives licks on my cheek without expectations. She does not get mad when I give her too much love. She’s only annoyed when I’m not feeding her a lot of treats.

She licks my cheek and the tip of my nose. She grinds her teeth (a form of rabbit purring) every time I pet her head. Me caring about her health is a form of love. Me watching her weight and buying her chew toys is showing my love. If I seriously did not love her, would I have given her away? Well no because I am a crazy animal lover… but there are people out there who do!

Almost a month ago, my best friend got spayed because female rabbits are prone to having serous ovarian cancer. Even one whole day without her was the most miserable time. I fell asleep early just to avoid the presence of missing my best friend. I consumed myself in cleaning her living space just for her comfortable area in recovery. I cried the night before due to my major fear of losing a pet. Because I have experienced losing a pet best friend before

There is no person waiting for me to come home. There is no other living being depending on me to take care of her. There is no other living being that is her. She is the apple seed of my apple. Animals are the definition of innocence; exactly how children are before being consumed by hate. They have no ill intentions… biologically they are competitive as they age and they are sexual due to their mating season.

I took chances on the wrong lovers. I placed my heart on the wrong people. I made the idea of lovers in my mind while they were nothing but a piece of shit. I made lovers with the wrong intentions. I always would ask, “am I in love or obsessed?” I would say it was an obsession because I could not reach them. My hand was never taken by them. I was living my own world in my mind.

I can for sure tell you, my love for my animal best friend is real. She is the definition of love because her feelings are tangible. Her feelings are fulfilling. Her love can be seen by her actions. Her love is recognizable and mutual.

I would rather be lonely than be in love with a bastard that does not know how to give love. I guess my heart broke too many times that I don’t need love from a man anymore. I broke and built. I had no other options in my life than to get my ass up and conquer the roads I had in front of me. There is no one that can save you besides yourself!

But my bunny is my animal best friend. There is nothing attached to her cuddling with me than the trust we gained for each other.

Right now, I want you to go and show love to your pet. If you are not affectionate or caring to your pet, that means you are not in love with your pet. Animals are always filled with pure intentions. Rabbits have been breaded domestically to become pets and show love.

Don’t be a person who gets a pet and gives it away simply their cuteness was going away. The hard work and commitment was simply too much for you. Don’t buy or adopt a pet if you are not ready for the pees and poops everywhere. They just want a belly rub, snuggles and the “I love you.” Even if they don’t understand. Like I said love before: love has now words.

by It.always.heals_

19 years old. College student. Aspiring story teller.
"Just exactly how Turkish coffee hold all the fortune we put our money into it,
I hold all my truths within my words"
-Asli Erem


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