My best piece of advice that I never follow is to move slow. Move with stealth. Move with the thought that every day is not the most important day of your life but rather a small, small detail in the galaxy of your life. Move like you don’t have to make a single decision today. Move to the beat of an Etta James song. Remind yourself that the turtle did win the race.
But no, I think fast, feel fast, move fast. I love fast. I can’t help it! It feels like it’s part of my DNA like I was born to love fast. Born to meet someone and just want to love them for the rest of my life. That doesn’t sound like a crime, but it damn feels like it.
I think about all the times boyfriends have moved out of my apartment because after two months of knowing them my heart couldn’t stand to be apart from them for even a DAY. Long story short it never works out. You would think at this point I would have some walls up, some hesitation towards partners. Something inside telling me that you don’t need to have such strong deep feelings towards people you barely know. Nope not me, not today.
Today everyone wants to love and if you say “nope not me” then you’re full of shit. You want to meet someone who looks at you the way you can’t stare into your eyes in the mirror for too long. You want to love your best friend. You want to love the person behind you in line at the grocery store. Loving is easier than hating someone, okay cool story but it is true.
Loving is such a tender act you say. It’s not the loving that is fast. It is the idea of togetherness. The idea that my soul feels connected by strings to yours. The fact that my brain turns into mush and the single brain cell I have left is to think about you. What a fucking waste of brain cells my god.
My best piece of advice I ultimately follow is to move the way you want. Let is be fast, let it be slow. Let it be with your partner, let it be with your career decisions, let it be with your art. Just move. And don’t second guess it.
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