Why are women constantly told they have to love their new bodies?
Look what your body did, they say! You created a miracle, they say! Let’s not forget the opposing side either – you must get your body back, they say! BUT – you must love your current body, while you go find your other body, they say!
Am I proud of this ol’ gal for building two humans, surviving the chaos of child birth and safely bringing perfect creatures into the world? Why, yes I am.
I also feel mushy. I feel tired. I feel weak. I feel uncomfortable. My boobs constantly feel like they are being strangled by my bra. My back fat feels like a gill that exists on some rare, ocean mammal. These fingers – they’re still sweaty sausages and the little bones in my feet ache for a lighter body to carry. My neck is angry, my ribs are confused, my pelvic floor visits the bathroom steadily and I’m just always kind of damp. I don’t love it.
I want to feel – that at any moment – I can strap two kids to my back, sprint across a field, hop a prison level fence, land on my feet like your local street cat all while holding a six pack of bud heavy. That is not my current body status. I don’t love it.
Am I hating on the ladies who do love the current body they’re in, no way. That’s rad – It’s just not how I feel. Will it stop me from wearing a bathing suit? Nah man, I’ve got rays to catch.
So – as I slowly go through this process of feeling strong again, I will exchange love notes with my beautiful closet. I miss her dearly. While she somberly waits for my return, I will not love it.
I am both proud and mushy and I don’t love it.