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Relationships

“Should I Block My Ex?” 9 Reasons You Should (and 5 Why You Shouldn’t)

“Should I break up with my ex?” Is there something I’m doing right?

Blocking your ex when you guys break up is like giving yourself a clean slate. It’s a way of saying that you’re moving on with your life and that you’re ready to start afresh. But sometimes, even after breaking up, there are certain instances when you can’t help but wonder if you did the right thing.

In fact, it might even be one of the hardest things to do after a breakup.

Sure, there are some people who seem to do it effortlessly and never look back, but for most of us, it’s a lot harder than it looks.

Dating back in the day, you could cut them off your life and not see them again with no problems. However, in today’s modern dating, it does not work like that. 

We are more interconnected than ever before, making it very hard to not want to check up on your ex.

Social media platforms can make it easy for you to stalk your ex. You can see what they are doing, who they are talking to, and even where they are. This can be tough if you have recently broken up and are trying to move on.

If you have gone through a breakup and are having trouble letting go or if you need some reasons that what you need was indeed the right thing to do (not the right thing to do), here are nine reasons whether you did the right thing (and 5 reasons you may have made a mistake!)

memory from relationship being broken

Why do people block their exes?

1) To move on

The blocking of an ex is a way for people to move on from the relationship. When someone blocks their former partner, it means they have consciously chosen not to hear from that person or see anything related to them online whatsoever for whatever reason it may have been.

2) To give themselves a clean slate

It is said that people will do anything to give themselves a clean slate. They may not want their exes around, and they’ll block them on social media if needed be to start fresh.

3) Because they are dating someone new and don’t want their ex to know

They don’t want their ex to know what they’ve been up to and they shouldn’t! They are living their best life with their new person.

couple arguing
Young couple arguing in their living room

4) Because they are worried their ex will harass them

Blocking them is a way to protect themselves from any possible harassment that their ex may dish out. You deserve your space and should not have to deal with anything negative from your ex.

5) They are still hung up on them

This is the most common reason. People usually block their exes when they are still hung up on them and cannot move on. They may want to keep tabs on them, but it isn’t healthy for them, so they take out any emotional involvement.

6) Because they are worried their ex will try to talk them out of the breakup

Blocking them will prevent any communication from happening. If you are sure about your decision to break up, then don’t let them talk you out of it.

7) To get closure

Blocking your ex could help you get closure on the relationship. It may be hard to achieve if you are still talking to them or seeing them online. But, if you block them, it can give you a sense of finality about the situation

8) They are playing with their feelings 

Some people are still in their immature phases, and they will use this opportunity to play with their feelings. They will try to get a reaction by doing something like this, and it is not worth your energy or time.

On the other hand, some people do have really healthy break ups, and they may choose to stay friends with their exes and not block them or there is hope that the relationship is salvage.

Here are some reasons why blocking your ex may not be the best idea:

couple talking in a desk laughing

1) You want to be friends with your ex

If you want to be friends with your ex, then you should not block them. Blocking them will only make things harder and may ruin any chance of repairing the relationship. However, you need to make sure you’ve healed for this to happen.

2) You want to get back together with your ex

If you are hoping to getting back together with your ex, then blocking them is not the way to go. You need to communicate with them and talk about what went wrong and try to work things out. However, if they are the one that broke up with you, then it may be best to know your worth and move on.

3) You have the same friend circle

If you and your ex share the same friend circle, then blocking them may not be the best idea. It can get pretty awkward if you run into them at a party or something. If you’re really not ready to see or talk to them yet, then it might be better to stay away from places where you know they’ll be.

4) You had a healthy break up

If you had a healthy break up, then there is no need to block your ex. You can stay friends and keep in touch. In fact, it might be beneficial for the both of you to remain friends so you can support each other when needed.

5) You need time and space to think things over

If you need time and space to think things over, then tell your ex that you need some time apart and explain why. If they are truly understanding, then they will give you the space you need and won’t contact you during that time. If they do contact you, then politely remind them that you need some time alone and if they are not respecting that, then block them.

Whether you choose or not too it’s ultimately your decision, but if you feel like your ex is affecting you in any way like the reasons listed below, then you should take action with your ex to block him and move on.

1) They cheated on you:

If your ex cheated on you, then it is a good idea to block them. You don’t need that type of negativity in your life, and it’s best to move on. Getting cheated on is one of the worst feelings in the world, and you don’t need that person to be a part of your life anymore.

man showing his first as anger showing early signs of a controlling man
angry man fist and sad woman on grey background

2) They were emotionally abusive.

If your ex was emotionally abusive, then it is definitely a good idea to block them from your life. This type of behavior is not healthy and you deserve someone who will respect you and treat you with respect.

3) The ex is being toxic.

There is no room for toxicity in your life, and if your ex is being toxic, then it is time for them to leave. If they are trying to control you or if they are making you feel bad about yourself, then it is definitely time to say goodbye.

4) Your instincts tell you to.

If you have a gut feeling that something is wrong, then it is. Block and move on.

5) You two are constantly breaking up and getting back together.

This is a toxic cycle, and it’s never going to end.

6) You feel bad.

You shouldn’t feel bad about doing something that you know will help you. If the reason you haven’t blocked them is that you feel bad, then you need to learn how to set boundaries with your ex.

7) They broke up with you first and are trying to come back.

If they broke up with you first and are now trying to come back, then they don’t deserve you. They showed you they weren’t ready for a committed relationship, and they shouldn’t expect you to take them back.

If you are asking yourself the question, “Should I block my Ex” Please remember that these are all valid reasons to block your ex. If any of these sound like something you are going through, then it is time to take action and block your ex. It’s never easy letting go of someone, but sometimes it is for the best.

Here is something to remember in the process:

girl using her phone checking social media

1) Social Media is not real Life:

While it may feel like your ex is everywhere you look, remember that social media only shows a snippet of someone’s life. It’s likely that your ex is doing just fine without you and doesn’t even realize you’ve blocked them.

2) You’re in Control:

girl reflecting on her life

It may seem like your ex has all the power in the relationship, but remember, you are in control of your own life. You get to choose who is in it and who isn’t.

3) It’s Okay to Move on:

It’s okay to move on from your ex and to start fresh. Blocking them doesn’t mean that you’re never going to talk to them again or that you hate them. It just means that you’re ready to move on with your life without them.

4) You Deserve Better:

Remember that you deserve better than someone who doesn’t respect your decision to block them. You are worth so much more than that.

5) There’s Nothing Wrong with You:

There’s nothing wrong with you for wanting to move on from your ex. It doesn’t mean that you’re heartless or that you never loved them. It just means that you’re ready to start a new chapter in your life without them.

FAQ When you think of the question, “Should I block my Ex?”

If I block him, how is he/she supposed to come back?

If they want to come back, they’ll find a way. However, you need to respect yourself enough to not let them back in if they’ve already shown that they’re not worthy of your time and energy.

What if we end up getting back together?

If you get back together, then that’s great! But, make sure that this time around, both of you are ready for a committed relationship. Always believe that whatever is for you will never leave you, mistreat you, or will do anything to hurt you.

How long will it take me to heal from this?

There is no set timeline for healing. Everyone heals at their own pace. Just make sure to be gentle with yourself and to take all the time you need. There is no timetable for healing, and you may experience different emotions at different times. But know that eventually, the pain will lessen and you will find happiness once again.

What am I supposed to do in the meantime?

In the meantime, do what makes you happy! Spend time with friends and family, go out and explore your city, read books. We have an entire article on how to date yourself and self date ideas for your perfect day.

Bottom Line

Please remember that your breakup happened for a reason. Never let your feelings impede a situation that you know no longer suits you. When you think of the question, “should I block my ex?” reflect on the situation and remember to always choose to put yourself first.

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by Genesis Gutierrez

Genesis is the founder of Harness Magazine, a digital media company that celebrates and elevates the voices of women around the world. A first-generation college graduate, Genesis holds a degree in from UCLA with hopes of going back for a Masters in Social Work.

Through her work as an editor-in-chief of Harness, Genesis has dedicated herself to amplifying the stories of women specifically marginalized communities. She is committed to creating space for those who are often left out of mainstream conversations, and believes that storytelling is one of the most powerful tools we have for building community and sparking social change.


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