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My Soul
Mental Health

The Depletion of My Soul

I am darkness

Falling downward into the dark hole of which I call life.

Darkness, surrounded by glimpses of faded light,

Atop my once clean blood.

Oh, the blood.

The crimson red of my veins turned black by a deep cold.

Seeping inward, outward,

And beyond.

My life is comprised of a series of paint splatters.

And tonight, this black paint envelopes me,

Depleting my soul

And all livelihood that once existed.

For tonight I wonder,

What is the point of it all?

My mere existence,

So microscopic compared to this universe I call home.

Yet I don’t feel at home.

I am running around this maze of chaos, confusion, and mystery.

All the while wondering why I do so.

Why do I bother?

When the crushing splatters of life are constantly thrown my way.

Onto my once clean blood.

Oh, the blood.

And this faded light,

Beckoning me.

I want this light to come forward,

To surpass the darkness and stay awhile.

But this darkness lingers on,

Pulling me down

Like a fishing lure hooking onto my throat,

And never quite letting go.

The blood seeps from the wound.

The crimson red of my veins turned black by a deep cold.

I am darkness.

I take away what matters most; 

Your higher purpose.

I paint your canvas dark to choke out the faded light.

To make it so faded,

That one day there will be no white.

There will be no light.

The red canvas of life you were born with,

Soon to be taken away.

Layer by layer,

Day by day.

Until the time comes

When you no longer see the splatters of life.

No longer will there be a piece of art below you. 

For your canvas will have turned black,

And I will have won.

The art that was once you,

Soon 

Shall be gone.

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Comment
by maguireke

My greatest passion in life is advocating for mental health. After living through depression, anxiety, and traumatic events in my life, I understand firsthand the pain and suffering that comes along with mental illness, and how it is rarely discussed throughout our society. My goal here is to shed some light on mental illness and work on smashing the stigma we have carried all too long. Thankfully, I am now in recovery for my mental illnesses and I hope to inspire and encourage others to seek treatment and find their light at the end of the tunnel.

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