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Relationships

The Significance of a Rainbow

THE SIGNIFICANCE OF A RAINBOW 

I never knew the significance
of a rainbow.

Until 15, 
bright-eyed with a heart 
full of possibilities.

On the porch swing of a table,
I asked my friend out
& he said no I’m gay
you’re the lone wolf I have told.

I sobbed for myself, and him. 
A throb of hormones,
I threw myself on to 
my best friend’s floor that night,

11 years passed like pages
of my favorite book,
not once did my mind
question why
I threw myself 
into the ocean at girls,
a desperate need 
to be their best friend.


I chopped it up to their fashion
style & kept my book close. 

I never called myself anyone’s
babydoll.

No one wanted me & who was I 
anyways?

But I saw them, &
the back of my throat clenched
while they read slam poetry
at my practicum. 

My hormones danced in unison,
& I picked them up off the floor
like pieces of popcorn.

Why was I embarrassed 
by this?
Maybe it was a message
I hit the ignore button on. 

I learned about the pronoun ‘they’
& used it diligently 
just the way I always arrived ten minutes
early to class.

Always. 

They texted me from a poetry slam event,
I wish I was with you instead.
A confetti gun went off
in my apartment,
Colorful,

Messy.

But worth it. 

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by sitagaia

Sita Gaia is a TEDx Alumnae, with her talk 'The Hell of Chronic Illness', and is also a goal focused Life Coach. She loves birds, Owls and hummingbirds in particular, and drinks way too much coffee. She has been working on poetry since grade 3.

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