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Poetry

You

I’d never loved anyone til you.

Fearless in my pursuit of you;

I was afraid of everything but you.

Fearless in showing the world

My big heavy heart and how much

It wanted you.

Always striving to be

Trusted by you,

Always working to be

Your safe haven.

 

You brought out my worst parts.

Impulsive, self-deprecating,

I allowed you to hurt me.

Always taking the blow

From you,

Always placating the worst

Parts of you.

 

Your walls were stronger than mine.

No, they were stubborn and unforgiving;

Cruel and unrelenting.

You called yourself a rock,

Not because you were firm or steady

But for your lack of ability

To move.

But you forget,

Rocks become smooth over time.

You couldn’t roll with the flow

But preferred it to crash over you

While you sat

Unmoving and silent,

Always waiting

For my hand to lift you up

Still believing

You were not worthy of love.

 

What a liar you were.

You were the only one I’d ever held,

The only one I wanted.

You were the only one to break my heart,

The only one timid enough

To make me brave.

But when I looked into your mosaic reflection,

I could see our future where you never

Saw your own,

And when I showed you affection,

You melted beneath these fingers

That have sown

Up a thousand tiny holes

In ancient pain that still lingers.

 

You

Brought out my very best parts.

Patience, perseverance,

And surrender.

In this big heavy heart

That survives memories

And still aches and still breaks

For all I could have been

And once was,

And still reminds me

You’re the only one

I’ve ever loved.

 

 

 

 

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by chasitybleu

Chasity Bleu is a self-taught artist pursuing a degree in Anthropology. She writes poetry, lyrics, essays, and has many novels in progress. She draws inspiration from all the things she loves: the Creator, humankind, Mother Earth, and love itself, representing all these in her art. Her paintings can be seen in We'Moon 2019 and 2020 datebooks, and she also runs an Etsy shop where she sells prints and originals. Find her on Instagram @silvansongpoetry & @chasitybleuart.


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