The triggers are everywhere,
Reminding me of how life is unfair.
The children’s section of a bookstore,
which I have to walk through,
The cute characters and titles making me blue.
A pregnant woman, I glare at her,
Immediately embarrassed of my own hate,
Jealousy and longing is my miserable fate.
The clothing store with the children’s section, all of the clothes so sweet,
Reminding me of the few items I keep in a drawer, a baby never will they meet.
Mother’s Day, the worst day of all days,
Reminding me of my failed womb,
The many embryos implanted that went from hope to an eternal tomb.
A baby’s smile warms and breaks my heart at the same time,
Reminding me of the child that will never be mine.
Children’s laughter can make me cry,
Tears in my eyes as the strollers stroll by.
That mom group of which I will never be a part,
That hole so deep, always in my heart.
Gone are the dreams of Motherhood,
Oh to forget the pain, i wish I could.
Something that I guess just wasn’t meant to be,
But why, oh why Lord, why not me?
Author: Lindsley Lowell
Author Bio: Lindsley Lowell is a writer and a poet. Her book, “My Knight in Shining Armor is Coming…He’s Just Stuck in Traffic” chronicles her dating adventures. She is divorced and prior to that, dated for 7,233 years. She is currently working on a book of poetry. She is a lover of all pink and resides in Los Angeles.
Link to social media or website: http://www.ladiesinthepink.com