Real Stories

If only someone told me…

If only someone told me what adulthood entails…

As I step into my 20s, I am drowning in the ocean, figuring out every thing that’s being thrown at me. The waves crashing against each other while I am trying to stay a float a little longer… trying to breathe.

If only someone told me its reality, I would have appreciated and loved being a youth more than I had.

I expected adulthood to be about work and some freedom in life after the intensive education journey. I was right about the part about work, but freedom is something that I have yet to see. I was thinking maybe its about work- life balance? Maybe, it’s just me? But the truth is freedom is hidden somewhere within and it’s a little hard to find it when it’s playing hide and seek with me.

Yes, sometimes I have time to spend with my family and friends. But the other days, I’m either working, studying or sound asleep. Time is still ticking but its difficult to coordinate lunch plans or quality time with your loved ones because everyone’s probably equally busy.

Hmm, maybe I just figured it out after some pondering… Freedom is definitely present, but maybe we don’t know what to do with it because it might be unfamiliar to us. The many options, the pros and cons, the brainstorming, the needs and wants. Maybe that’s why it’s difficult to make a choice, even when its ours to make. Being independent is tough either way.

Next comes financial planning. I knew this would start right after adulthood… but its quite difficult to navigate in my 20s. I know about budgeting and saving.. but investments is something still out of the ordinary for me. Every site I browse, every person I speak to says things differently. Maybe one day I’ll figure it out, but for now I’ll try to pretend to be carefree.

Sometimes adulthood can also feel quite isolating. We go through the mundane routines to sustain and maintain our future goals and desires. But we tend to forget about our present being. We forget to give it the warmth, love, care it needs. Family and friends can get busy, and that’s part of adulting. Our schedules don’t match and that’s okay. But I think it’s important to care for yourself with or without the presence of people around you.

Maybe, that’s what makes adulthood beautiful? The love you have for yourself. The ability to provide for yourself and your loved ones. The perseverance to battle through each day. The determination to achieve your goals. The passion and fire you have within you to start living your dreams one day.

I guess adulthood is beautiful in its own ways. It’s what you make out of both the good and bad days!


by Thiviya

Thiviya. A is a writer and poet from Singapore. She first discovered her passion for writing when she started using writing as her coping mechanism when faced with challenges in life. Writing has helped her to process her thoughts and encourage herself. She created @wingsofwords_poetry on Instagram in June 2021 to create a positive and safe space for the community. She believes that as long as she helps an individual, her goal in poetry writing is fulfilled. Through the years, she took part in many anthologies and competitions. She also wrote her first poetry collection, titled 'The Survivor Spirit' which discusses about healing and hope amidst the struggles one faces in life. Outside of poetry and writing, Thiviya is just an ordinary woman who goes through the motions of studies. She is currently a graduate in Diploma in Social Sciences (Social Work) and can't wait to continue on with her journey in education and life.

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