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Relationships

What to do When He Texts After Ignoring You?

Figuring out what to do when a guy texts you after ignoring you can be difficult.

No doubt, dating can leave you stressed and broken when a guy starts ignoring your texts and calls, and it sucks not knowing the valid reason behind it! 

It continuously triggers into your head and you keep asking yourself questions like —

Firstly, you need to calm down because things are not always how they seem or how you assume them. There can be many reasons why your boyfriend or crush ignored you. This doesn’t always have to be negative, as many times people really do get stuck in their own lives. 

girl checking her phone after guy texts her after ignoring her

When he finally texts you after ignoring you, there should be a mature communication about where he was or why he didn’t text you earlier. Communication is the key to understanding things that are usually not expressed! 

However, if there wasn’t any important reason behind it and he just did it to make you chase him, you need to think things through. 

Remember that if you need to beg for somebody’s love or attention, you’re not with the right person. People who love you will cherish and celebrate you at every step of your relationship with them! 

Trust me; you will get that beautiful gut feeling once you meet the right person, because that feeling is the rarest one of all. You should know that dating is supposed to be fun, filled-up with lovely moments, full of new experiences and happiness.

When a guy is genuinely into you, he will respect you and your time. They don’t have to show this by texting you daily. Instead, you can see it by the simple efforts he puts into the relationship. 

But if he has started ignoring your texts and calls, and doesn’t respond to you properly, it’s time you figure out the root cause of it. 

In this article, you’ll get detailed information about why he’s been ignoring you for days, how long you should wait to text him back after ignoring you, and whether you should answer his call after neglecting you! 

What to do when he texts after ignoring you? 

It’s mature to understand that people get busy sometimes and texting back can slip anybody’s mind for zero alternate motives. But, nobody’s too busy to let you know they’re stuck by simply dropping a text—“I am busy, I will call you later.” 

By just letting your partner know about your busy schedule, you can clear things, offer them peace of mind, and avoid your partner from overthinking their brains off. 

However, if you have no clue why your partner has gone missing, here is how to deal with it: 

1. Find the reason for why he started ignoring your messages 

Understanding guys is very challenging. There’s always a reason behind all their moves, so your first step should be to try and find it out. 

Start digging into the past and try to think why he’s doing this. Did you say or do anything earlier that is causing this behavior? Or is this one of the red flags that you must’ve missed that concludes whether he’s really into you or just playing games with you. 

If this is not the first time he is doing something like this, you must think before bringing him back into your life. Maybe this is your shortcut out of this toxic relationship. 

Communication is the key in any relationship, and if one person is not ready for it, it’s time to step back and reconsider your connection again. 

2. Start defining for how long he has been ignoring you

The duration of break he took is enough to understand his interest in you. If he goes away frequently and ignores you for long spans of time, maybe he’s not the one. 

girl reflecting on the sidewalk

Suppose you two are in a relationship and had a couple of heated arguments, then maybe he was angry and ignored you to calm things down within himself. However, this isn’t the right way to deal with arguments and you should try to approach him with peaceful communication. 

The best solution in such circumstances is to talk things out calmly, while respecting each other’s opinions. 

But if that’s not the case and he just casually started ignoring you for a couple of days, you can ignore him in return or maybe separate yourself from him completely. 

Toxic guys like to think too highly of themselves, and want their partner to make them feel like a king. Though seeking attention like this makes them the worse of men on planet Earth, and you’re better off them. 

3. Determine the feelings you’ve felt in his absence

Before you do something out of anger, ego, or overthinking, ask your heart what it feels for this guy. Is there love and peace in your heart even after it’s treated this way by them? 

Try to get sorted about your feelings first; it’s best not to reply when you’re hurt, angry or desperate. Think about how you felt when he was busy ignoring your presence. 

I know their text might have brought you happiness, and you feel overwhelmed or excited, but it’s also essential to know your worth. 

Don’t get too excited and sound desperate by replying to people who ghost you. Think about yourself first and figure out if this boy is really worth your time. Take some time off; if necessary, take two steps back from this connection and prioritize yourself in all situations. 

Always remember that people won’t respect you or your presence, until you respect yourself. If you show them you’re a pushover, they’ll keep pushing you over in all situations. 

Set your boundaries and respect them! 

4. Please don’t reply to him immediately 

I get it when you’ve been waiting for somebody’s text for a long time and you finally get it, it skips one of your heartbeats. But replying to him immediately will make you sound desperate and needy, which is not good after how unwanted he’d made you feel. 

It’d be better not to respond and show him you’re not someone who he can toss away whenever he feels like. Take your time off him, just like he does it. 

5. Try not to ignore him back in return

We are all different human beings with complex characteristics. For some of you, getting closure is very important. In such cases, ignoring him in return might hurt you in the future and leave you guilty for not responding to him. 

Even after moving yourself away, you may still feel connected somehow because you never got closure. Just like I said, you need to be a hundred percent sure about your feelings and then come to a decision. If you can’t resist him and feel the need to communicate all about it, then yes, go for it. But try not to burst into him on the phone; take it slowly. 

6. It’s time for you to inform him about your boundaries 

Sometimes you may feel like you should not text back or respond to their highly-awaited message, but the next day, you can’t control the urge. I understand, it happens with all of us. 

But if you surrender to your urge, and get back to texting them after they have ghosted you for so long, there’s a high chance they’ll repeat the same behavior. This is because they know you’re not going anywhere and they have you under control. 

What if they leave you ignored again? Will you keep disrespecting yourself to place them high above just like how they want it? No matter how much pleasure you get in this toxic love, you must set your boundaries. 

couple having a disagreement

This is not the right way to treat anybody, and you can’t have a healthy relationship until you set your boundaries. Start drawing limits for people who don’t text for weeks to check up on you; let them know that you are aware of your importance, dignity and self-respect. 

It’s high time to stop wasting your time on men who cannot keep up to commitments and are in your life for nothing. Trust me; you’re too good to be a second thought for weak men like these. 

7. Maybe you were too available 

Ask yourself, were you too available for this guy? Did you put everything else aside and say yes to everything he asked? 

People often don’t value you when you’re too available. It’s not wrong to be up on heels for somebody all the time, but they should be worthy of it. 

When you make yourself too available to unworthy people, they try to misuse the opportunity. So if he’s returning to you now, make sure you let him know that you’re available but not accessible. 

8. Is he playing games with you?

Another reason why he might be ignoring you is maybe he’s dating someone else and just playing games with you. He wants you to chase him, and that is all you are for him—a chaser. 

guy talking to multiple girls at once

The best I can suggest is to stop dealing with these little immature boys who can offer you nothing but their little play games. 

You can find out if this is the actual case by not texting him back. He’d come back again with some sweet talk if he is not getting any attention from your side. People always come back when they see you having fun without them. Be brave and try not to fall for their cute words. 

9. Be straight forward and don’t reveal your feelings 

Let’s not even keep it as an option. Trust me; nothing is worse than showing your feelings to a person who doesn’t care enough. You have no idea why he’s texting you after weeks of ignorance, so it’s better not to say anything about your feelings and let him do the talking.

Try not to get panicked about what to do or what not to do. When he texts you after a long time, spend more time listening to him and noticing his behavior. 

If he makes new promises and talks to you sweetly to win you back, hold your ground. Do not trust him or put your faith in a single word coming out of his mouth. 

Words do not matter, actions do. 

If he’s returning after ignoring you, take your time and understand his actions before pouring all your love on him again. If he’s constant with his efforts, maybe he realized your value and really wants to be with you. 

If he gets irritated or done when you do not show any affection back, it’s your hint he was only back to waste more of your time. 

Don’t worry; you’ll eventually understand if he’s really into you or just playing games around. You’ll make a good decision at the right time; until then, stay calm. 

10. Look after your own behavior as well 

Okay, I get it he’s been ignoring you for days, but what if he’s hurt because of you or any of your behavior? As I mentioned before, guys are challenging to understand; they might act all tough, but you’ll never know what smallest act of yours may hurt his feelings. 

So start reflecting on your behavior, too, and figure out if there’s something you did that made him distant. If you really believe an action that made him go away, it’s only mature to talk about it and sort it out. 

Tell him you didn’t know that particular thing hurt him, but you’d make changes and not repeat the same. After all relationships are efforts put by both sides! 

How long should I wait to text him back after he ignored me?

The answer for this depends from situation to situation. Each couple has their own special problems and circumstances, so you really need to think thoroughly before texting him back. 

girl waiting on a table for guy to text her

Although one thing should be clear—It’s not an excellent option to text him back immediately until you get your feelings sorted out. 

This decision is important as it affects your love life, mental health, growth and many more things. Before choosing anything, choose yourself. Never forget to put yourself first in all parts of your life! 

Here’s how long you should wait to text him back after he ignored you: 

  • If he has been ignoring you just for a day 

Sometimes we don’t have the energy to text back people, and it is okay. All we want to do is just lay down and have our own space. If he’s been ignoring you for a day, then don’t panic; give him his own space, and he’ll be back soon when he feels like it. 

If he texts after ignoring you for a day, you should go ahead and talk to  him about what is going on. Ask him about how he felt yesterday or if he needs space to feel better again. Nothing is more beautiful than a partner who understands you. 

Let him know that you are there for him no matter what happens, and that he can come to you and share everything. Just tell him you’ll quietly listen to whatever he has to say!

  • If he has been ignoring you for more than two weeks

It’s entirely wrong of a person to keep their partner ignored for over two weeks. In any circumstances, they should be responsible to let their lover know about their whereabouts and communicate frequently. 

Perhaps, there could be very special occasions that may require him to stay away. But he should have something very important to say when he appears after two weeks. 

If he had been away for his delicate ego and toxic mentality, I don’t think it’s an excellent option to reply to him immediately. Show him your worth and let him know you have boundaries. This will tell him that you’re not always going to be available as per his desires. 

Let him do the talking, let him explain, and after observing everything, you make your decision. Always remember not to take any decision while being emotional and vulnerable; be brave and say it with all your heart. 

  • When he’s texted you after months of ignorance 

I think we need a valid excuse here to text him back. If he’s texting you after months of ghosting, it’s a clear red flag. 

If you feel like you miss him and should reply, then trust me, you can miss someone and still don’t want them back in your life. 

It’s okay to have an emotional flashback of memories, but to deal with the same thing again will destroy you and the beautiful heart you carry. Take as many hours or days as you need to sort out your feelings, as it will make a big difference. Always remember to love yourself first!

Should I answer his call after he ignored me?

Again, it won’t be a good option to pick up his call immediately. Take your time and think about why he may be calling you now. Don’t let your heart take over or think emotionally that he misses you; he might be bored, lonely, or maybe like to apologize. 

But none of this is your concern; you’ll call him back when you’re good and sorted about what you want from him. 

Bottom line 

Relationships are tough, and understanding a guy is tougher. You never know what’s going on in his head, what he is up to now, whether he’s really into you, and the list goes on. Whether you should text him back or ignore him is up to you, and it depends on what kind of a relationship you two had, why he started ignoring you, and how you are feeling now. 

Be calm and observe the situation you are in. Be mature, act smart, and have a face-to-face talk, if you want to sort things out. Give him some time to explain and then the decision will be yours!

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by Genesis Gutierrez

Genesis is the founder of Harness Magazine, a digital media company that celebrates and elevates the voices of women around the world. A first-generation college graduate, Genesis holds a degree in from UCLA with hopes of going back for a Masters in Social Work.

Through her work as an editor-in-chief of Harness, Genesis has dedicated herself to amplifying the stories of women specifically marginalized communities. She is committed to creating space for those who are often left out of mainstream conversations, and believes that storytelling is one of the most powerful tools we have for building community and sparking social change.


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