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Relationships

Do Soulmates Look Alike?

Yes and no! 

You may have encountered many instances where a couple would react the same way or speak simultaneously. While it’s common to develop similar personality traits given the time together— is it fundamentally correct for facial features and appearance, too? 

Debatable! For some couples, it may be true. For others, not so much! I have seen couples who look completely different and couples who share similarities.

It can happen to couples who have been living together for a long time and also to partners who don’t know each other yet. So, is it true? Are these couples really a product of heaven where souls are made and separated on earth to meet again? 

Sounds delusional and mystical, right? But in all its authority, we cannot remove the possibility of it being actually true. I’m not ignorant, but let’s keep it aside until it has some grounding facts. 

For the time being, let’s look at some of the psychological evidence/studies on whether soulmates look alike or not. 

Psychological reasons why some soulmates look alike

Psychologically speaking, there are many patterns that may as well justify the existence of this statement ‘do soulmates look alike.’ 

As culturally widespread as it may be, “opposites attract” still remains a delirious myth. Almost 80% of the population believes in “opposites attract,” however only in theories. In reality, individuals often try to find a compatible partner and share similarities, beliefs, and personality traits. 

Somehow, if they do get connected with a polar opposite person— one or the other would try to change their partner to feel more comfortable, compatible, and understood. 

‘Opposites attract’ is true as long as it’s applied to magnets. For humans, similarities and same beliefs matter. Of course, exceptions do follow, but at the cost of compromise, conflicts, daily arguments, different orientations, miscommunication, less romance, severe distance, etc. 

In conclusion, psychological studies deduce humans to be more attracted to someone similar— this goes all the way to personality, appearance, looks, and features. 

Although keep in mind that these choices are often subconscious—choosing someone who matches your energy, appearances, choices, and personality isn’t intentional; it comes naturally and subconsciously. 

Psychologists study two different versions of soulmates to develop a proper analysis. 

  1. Soulmates who have been together for years can catch similar lifestyles, hobbies, diets, and interests. These interests may shape their physique and muscle proportion, making both partners look similar. (More on this ahead in the article.)
  1. Soulmates who haven’t met yet: So your soulmate is out there being your photocopy? Not so much. However, your soulmate may be searching for someone just like them for reasons we’ll conclude ahead. 

Why do couples start to look alike when living together?

It’s not unusual to catch similar personality traits and hobbies with your partner. I have a habit of catching accents whenever I’m around someone new— it’s something I do unconsciously.

If I can learn new accents within a series of days, couples who live together for years can and most certainly will adapt their partner’s personality and similar traits. 

Of course, these similar interests and traits wouldn’t make them a xerox photocopy of each other. However, it’s ignorant to consider that these traits wouldn’t yield a little significant similarity in their appearance. 

Similar fashion and style

Have you ever encountered Brad Pitt and his ever-changing hair color/hairstyle? The actor is known for matching his haircut/hairstyle with his partner(s). The media quotes, “Brad Pit: the man who likes to look like his girlfriend.” 

Similar hair color and hairstyle are just one of the many patterns humans adapt while living together. It can go as far as wearing the same outfits, makeup, accessories, and colors. While such is not the case with every couple out there— it’s definitely more common (subconsciously) than you may think. 

Also, their attire or makeup doesn’t always have to be a xerox copy of each other— instead, they wear a similar vibe. 

For instance, emo couples may wear dark-themed outfits with chains, bold kajal/eyeliner/mascara, nose pins, leather jackets, etc. This resemblance makes people believe that the two share similar features, camouflage at its best. 

On the other hand, some couples share brighter/vibrant colored attires— their sunshine appearance will radiate the same energy, thus making people believe that they look alike. 

I have been told quite a few times that my best friend and I have started to look alike, and we share zero facial similarities. This comment usually blooms whenever we wear the same shade of lipstick (dark maroon) or similar outfits. 

Examples of couples who share similar fashion and style: 

Of course, there’s Brad Pitt and his ex-partners, but have you ever seen Lisa Bonet and Jason Momoa? Well, their long and chiseled faces aren’t the only similarities the couple shares. Their thick and bohemian locks, sun-kissed skin, and a similar hippie vibe give them an uncanny resemblance. 

Another great couple with a striking resemblance is — Megan Fox and Machine gun kelly. With their chiseled jaw, sharp nose, and equally jaw-dropping fashion— it’s hard to separate their entity. Megan fox and Machine gun kelly are also known for sharing similar fashion vibes— they become retro together, then emo, then colorful street vogue, and back to sassy.

They share the same hobbies.

Similar hobbies can shape similar physiques and facial expressions. 

For instance, 

  • A sporty couple would share physical similarities, especially if they are into the same sport. This can happen to soulmates who haven’t met yet. They follow the same gym workout, diet, and routine. The intensity of these similarities increases when they actually become a couple in the future. 
  • Or, couples who read will share similar facial expressions— they often would have a serene look on their face. 

The chances are still off-the-bait, but we are discussing rare possibilities here. 

I once dated a man who was equally devoted to reading— we used to read day and night and often talked about philosophy. When talking about philosophy, our entities used to become one—we would smile, laugh, and snicker simultaneously. 

Couples mirror each other.

Another great contrast I have seen amongst couples is their facial expression. They unknowingly mimic their partner’s expressions/actions— whether it’s their smile, nose wrinkles, or laughter. Having similar facial expressions also contributes to the appearance similarities couples share. 

You mirror their actions unknowingly. For instance, 

  • If your partner uses hand expressions while talking, you’ll soon catch that habit while living with them.
  • We develop a similar reflex system with our soulmates as well. 

Soulmates subconsciously mirror emotions to comfort their partner; such is the case with many observant partners. They observe their partner’s emotions and needs keenly and will mirror in efforts to bring comfort. 

  • One or the other partner may mirror how their partner cries or stresses, resulting in similar laughing/crying facial lines or forehead stress lines.
  • Over the years of living together, continuously mirroring your partner’s emotion and behavior will emphasize those muscle changes and thus will result in an intensified resemblance. 

Selena Gomez and The weekend eventually started to look alike when they started mirroring each other’s expressions, plus their cute round face was an instant giveaway. It sucks that they aren’t together, but not all soulmates end up together. 

They pick habits and mannerisms.

As discussed, soulmates living together for years also tend to pick their partner’s habits and mannerisms. This doesn’t limit to good habits but goes all the way to bad habits/mannerisms. 

They will pick each other’s accents, language, dialect, slang, and reaction to mirror each other, contributing more towards a similar appearance. 

Soulmates who look alike but have never met before

We can still fathom or accept the similarity between couples who have been living together for ages, but considering the same for couples who have never met? Now, that’s utterly bizarre. 

Luckily, psychology serves us many answers that may as well reason the same statement. 

Human nature seeks validation.

“We don’t look for the differences; we look for acceptance.”

Many individuals would seek a partner sharing similar facial features— in a twisted way, through this subconscious selection, they are trying to love and accept their own appearance and shortcomings. Such is the case with individuals dealing with insecurities and the burden of beauty measures. 

Insecure people cannot love themselves wholly because they judge themselves way too often. However, such individuals would also subconsciously choose a partner with similar facial features to love those very flaws that make them hate/despise themselves. 

These cases are rare and, thus, remain bizarre. 

We accept ourselves through the similarities we share with others. For instance, you may have often developed a soft corner for actors/actresses/celebrities who share a little similarity with your appearance— perhaps, a thick nose, big teeth, small eyes, height, face, etc. 

It’s natural and subconscious to gravitate towards someone who looks like you. 

This choice makes individuals feel more secure and safe in the relationship. Why? Imagine being in a relationship with someone way out of your league. You’d inevitably feel insecure in that relationship. 

You’d be constantly worrying about rejection or betrayal. These relationships and such insecurities will also stem jealousy! So, people often find comfort in dating someone who shares similarities— it’s twisted but also natural. 

Don’t forget; these choices are subconscious— these people may never know, and it’s alright! It’s normal; it’s human. 

Individuals gravitate towards people who look familiar. 

How many times have you dated someone who shares a similar contrast with that of your family? Rewind your past relationships, and see if you can find someone who shares similarities with your dad/mom/cousins/other family members.

Well, did you? It doesn’t need to be appearance; many seek partners who share similar personality traits with their parents/family. 

Eventually, your genes would flame and give you a similar appearance to that of your mom/dad or other family members. Our parents shape our perspective, at least initially, because we grow up with them, we watch, and we observe them. It’s natural to accept and agree to their beliefs and choices. 

Your mother would suggest an ideal partner be someone like your dad and vice versa. So, it’s natural to gravitate towards someone like your mom/dad. Similarly, if you idolize your parents, you want someone just like them. 

Seeking someone familiar brings comfort and a homely feeling for individuals. 

Same background

Interracial marriages are becoming more and more common. Gone are the days when interracial marriages were frowned upon and looked down upon by society. However, many individuals still prefer marriages in the same caste/religion/race. 

Similar religion/race offers individuals many similarities— appearance, religious practices, rituals, faith, culture, traditions, attire, language, body proportion/height/mass (similar for couples of the same country) 

The same background allows individuals to be more comfortable. Soulmates may choose the same background for several reasons: 

  • Better communication: Language can be a huge barrier when it comes to communicating with people from different countries. Even when individuals decide to learn a foreign language for their partners, it’s long before you completely understand your partner and their true emotions. 

So, most people choose someone from their own country and background than elsewhere, 

  • Same beliefs: Every country is diverse in beliefs. These beliefs may vary and synchronize. For many individuals, having similar beliefs with their partner is more strengthening and blissful. 
  • Same appearance: As said, we shape our choices by the people and perspectives around us. Some may outgrow from this behavior, but that perspective remains a lifetime for others. 

Have you seen Jay Shetty and Radhi Devlukia? They are both British Indians, and the striking similarity is uncanny! 

Examples of similarities between couples who share similar facial features 

Even a single similarity can make people believe that you and your partner are a lookalike— illusion of the mind. 

  • Same eye shape/color: Couples with the same eye color have a striking resemblance. I mean, look at Benedict Cumberbatch and Sophie Hunter, with their deep ocean blue eyes, long matching faces, and the cupid bow/full lips. The contrast is bizarre. 
  • Same face shape: Courtney cox and Johnny Mcdaid both share an angular face cut and strikingly heavenly blue eyes. 
  • Pale skin, small features: Kristen Steward and Robbert Pattison are great examples. Their pale skin and sparkly vampire bodies were deemed as one, especially when Kristen turned into a vampire in the series Twilight.
  • Sharp features: Ever seen a couple with chiseled jaws, edgy brows, and sharp eyes/cheekbones? Well, look at Rooney Cara and Joaquin Phoenix and make a judgment for yourself. 

What does science say about ‘do soulmates look alike?

Scientifically speaking, there’s not much evidence backing up the same statement, so it remains a baseless fictional thought. 

However, is the intrinsic mind of a human being/universe’s doing ever so easily comprehended? No, science remains far from understanding the complexity of human emotions, love, cosmic connection, and the beyond. Some phenomena remain baseless but cannot be dispersed for the sake of reality. 

FAQs

Is it true that couples who look alike are meant to be together?

Not necessarily. The success of a relationship doesn’t depend on the physical similarities you share with your partner. It doesn’t depend on looks at all. Sure, relationships start with attraction, but that’s only the start. For relationships to work, you need more than just good and/or similar looks. 

Relationships thrive on communication, empathy, respect, and commitment. Without valuable morals in a relationship, it will fail even if you look alike. 

The possibility of soulmates looking alike is rare, but it still doesn’t guarantee togetherness. Relationships succeed on the intrinsic value of a person, not extrinsic. 

Do soulmates look like siblings?

Soulmates are partners who share an extreme connection between two different souls— they don’t share a single soul, nor do they always have the same features. As a matter of fact, even siblings from the same parents can look completely different. So, the question is utterly baseless and a little uncomfortable for couples who actually look alike. 

Many couples who look alike must have heard these questions at least once (or more) in their lifetime.  

  • “Are you siblings?” 
  • “Are you brothers and sisters?”

As uncomfortable as it may seem, some people simply cannot resist the similarities some couples share. It’s intriguing. 

Researchers have found striking evidence for the existence of doppelgangers. Doppelgangers are fascinating— they are lookalikes of a person but aren’t biologically related to that very person. Further studies report that these doppelgangers may even share many similarities in their DNA. 

Francois Brunelle, a Canadian photographer, has so far photographed 16 astonishingly similar doppelgangers. So, partners who fret about being called siblings can throw this theory in their faces the next time intruders attack them with such baseless ridicule. 

No, couples who look alike aren’t a product of incest. Individuals choosing someone similar is a subconscious selection, not incest. Two studies were held to determine the consciousness behind choosing your lookalike.

In the first research, subjects were shown two morphed pictures. The first picture was a morph of themselves with their partner (self-based morph), and the second morph was their partner’s face with that of a same-sex prototype (partner-based morph). 

The study showed that most subjects were attracted to the self-based morph more than the partner-based one, resulting in the conclusion that people prefer someone who looks like them. 

The same study was held to understand the conscious level behind these choices. In this research, subjects were told, “we are interested in studying incest. We want to know how attractive people find faces that resemble genetic relatives such as parents, brothers, and sisters.” 

As a result, most participants chose “self-based morph” as less sexually attractive. Thus concluding, choosing someone who looks alike is a subconscious decision. 

Are we attracted to those who look like us?

Love is weird, and attraction is unfathomable. You never know or realize why you get attracted to some people and don’t feel dopamine with others. 

Biologically, your body experiences multiple chemical reactions when you feel attraction towards someone and vice versa. This attraction can be triggered by your hormones, smell, and perceived preferences. Surprisingly, everyone will have different preferences— some individuals prefer intelligence, others want looks.

It can be as simple as being attracted to someone’s hands or their fashion or as big as being attracted to someone’s personality. 

So to say that we are only naturally attracted to our lookalike is absurd. Individuals may or may not be attracted to lookalikes. It’s a possibility, but not the case for every couple. 

Do twin flames look alike?

Twin flames are individuals who share one soul in two bodies; the same is not necessary for their physical attributes. 

What does twin flame mean?

“We, the strangers, feel so familiar.

Your eyes remind me of mine.

Your strange smile comforts me

and calls me into the abyss.

We aren’t lovers, said the twins

but we breathe together, 

feel together,

share pain and laughter. 

This uncanny connection that we cannot name, 

it’s majestic and absolutely blissful.”

Twin flames feel poetic— they share the same mind, emotions, connection, intelligence, reaction, and growth. They are givers for each other and would remain the same for life. 

Twin flames aren’t always lovers; they can be siblings, strangers, friends, or other family members. 

So, do twin flames look alike? 

People who have found their spiritual twin flames do notice a striking contrast between themselves and their twin flames, especially their eyes. 

Some even go beyond and look at the exact copy of each other despite having different races, colors, and religions. 

Their resemblance isn’t identical but noticeable in small details. So it’s true that twin flames look alike. Some may share limited similarities with their twin flames; others can have heavy parallelism. 

My twin flame is my brother; we share the same mind and thought process and witness similar telepathy. He aids my growth, and I aid his growth. 

There’s comfort and serenity around me when he’s around, and the same goes for him. We share a spiritual connection and do share many physical similarities as well. Of course, these shared similarities can be a product of genetic similarities, but I have experienced being a twin flame, and it’s blissful. 

Conclusion

Having a doppelganger or a lookalike has always been fascinating for human beings— it generates a weird curiosity amongst individuals when they do come across such people. 

However, having a look alike doesn’t guarantee love. So, before you go ahead and end a beautiful relationship, please know that many soulmates can look completely different.

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by Genesis Gutierrez

Genesis is the founder of Harness Magazine, a digital media company that celebrates and elevates the voices of women around the world. A first-generation college graduate, Genesis holds a degree in from UCLA with hopes of going back for a Masters in Social Work.

Through her work as an editor-in-chief of Harness, Genesis has dedicated herself to amplifying the stories of women specifically marginalized communities. She is committed to creating space for those who are often left out of mainstream conversations, and believes that storytelling is one of the most powerful tools we have for building community and sparking social change.


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