How to Glow up after a Breakup – Your Ultimate Guide

Learning how to glow up after a breakup can feel intimidating.

No one ever said breaking up was easy. It’s tough, it’s painful, and it can take a toll on your body and mind. It can honestly set you back emotionally and make you question everything about yourself and the relationship.

It can be months until you start to feel like yourself again.

However when you are ready to accept what happened and move on, it can truly be a liberating experience.

Just because your relationship has ended doesn’t mean you have to end too. You can pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and glow up after a breakup.

You’ll turn into this amazing strong, confident individual who has learned from their mistakes and is ready to take on the world. And trust me, it’s worth it.

However, it can be an overwhelming journey and feelings of loss and hopelessness start to arise. It can be difficult learning how to start. So, how do you?

How do you put yourself in a position where you learn how to glow up after a breakup?

Here are 36+ tips to get you started:

Feel out Your Feelings:

girl hiding under blankets

Allow yourself to fully feel your emotions. Cry, scream, and write down what you’re feeling. Know that what you’re going through is completely normal, and it’s important to process and work through your feelings before moving on.

If you try to bury your emotions, they will only come out later in unhealthy ways, so it’s important to work through them instead.

Be Kind to Yourself

Everyone goes through a tough breakup at some point in their lives. Cut yourself some slack and have patience with yourself during this time. Don’t beat yourself up over small things.

Being kind to yourself is accepting that this is a tough time and you’re doing your best. It’s about loving yourself through it all, even the parts that are hard to love. Understanding that not everything is your fault and that everything truly does happen for a reason.

Shift Your Mindset

It can be hard to shift your mindset when you feel like everything in your life is going wrong. But try to flip your perspective and focus on what you can control.

Instead of expressing how miserable you feel because of this breakup, focus on the good things in your life, like your friends, family, career, or hobbies. If you think to yourself that you are alone in this journey, celebrate being single, you’re welcoming growth into your life.

Lean for Support

gilr being sad

Don’t be afraid to reach out for support from friends and family. Surround yourself with people who love and believe in you. Talking about things with people that you care about can help immensely during this time.

Go out with them, invite them to go out to eat with you, or just watch a movie together. Don’t be afraid to use them as a source of strength and comfort during this time.

Go to therapy

If you don’t feel comfortable talking to your friends and family about what you are going through, consider going to therapy. A therapist can provide a safe, non-judgmental environment for you to talk about your feelings and help guide you through the process of healing.

It can also play a huge role in helping you reflex on the relationship, what you need to work on in your own life, and what you need to do moving forward towards a having a healthy relationship when you feel ready too.

Change Environments

Sometimes a change of scenery can do wonders for your mood and emotions. Consider going on vacation or even just a weekend getaway to clear your head and have some time for self-reflection.

If you can’t leave town, take a day trip to a nearby park or beach. Go on a bike stroll, go hiking or just spend time outdoors. Being around nature can help you relax and reset your mind, body, and soul.

Going to a new place and seeing how big the world is can also help you realize that there are endless possibilities out there for you. Possibilities outside of the relationship that you were in.

Learn how to be alone

Learning how to be alone is a good way to glow up after a break up. It can be tough, it’s painful, and it can take a toll on your body and mind. It can honestly set you back emotionally and make you question everything about yourself. It’s important to remember that you are your biggest cheerleader.

You can start by doing small things such as going for a walk alone, eating at a restaurant alone or even going to the movies alone. By learning to be comfortable on your own and taking the time to enjoy yourself, you are paving the way to glowing up after a breakup.

Even though it can feel intimidating, don’t let fear hold you back from embracing change and using this opportunity to grow.

Dive into something new that brings you joy and fills your time

friends working out together working on themselves

Find a new hobby or activity that brings you joy and fills up some of your time.

This could be anything from

  • Painting
  • Dancing
  • Cooking
  • Gardening
  • Writing
  • Self Defense

By doing something new and engaging your mind in an activity that stirs up positive emotions, you can shift your energy towards learning and growing. This will help you refocus on yourself and embrace the changes and opportunities that lie ahead.

Don’t take shortcuts

Healing from a break doesn’t have a timeline. It’s important to take your time and not take shortcuts by jumping into a rebound relationship or trying to numb your feelings with substances.

Rebounds hardly make you feel better in the long-term and only distract you from what you are truly feeling.

If you try to take any sort of shortcut in your glow up process, you will only end up prolonging your healing and hurting yourself in the long run.

Create a new routine

Create a new daily routine for yourself that promotes courage, self-love, and growth. This can be any activity that you have had your eye on, whether it’s joining a gym, practicing yoga or meditation, or even just making your bed every morning.

Having a routine will give you structure during this time and help keep you on track with taking care of yourself.

Eliminate toxic people

Take some time to reflect on who is in your life and consider removing anyone who brings negativity into your life. This could be a toxic ex, their friends, or even just negative people in your friend group. Surround yourself with people who uplift and support you instead.

It’s okay to let go of friendships that no longer serve you, and it’s okay to feel like you’ve outgrown your group of friends.


Taking care of yourself during this time is essential. Practice self-care activities such as getting enough sleep, eating healthy, exercising, and doing things that make you happy. This will help improve your mood and overall well-being.

Something that I’ve enjoyed during my Friday Nights is doing my nails, doing my hair and enjoying a cup of wine with a face mask.

Write down everything you didn’t like about them

Writing down all the things about your ex that you didn’t like, or that made you unhappy can help put things into perspective and remind yourself of why the breakup was for the best.

You’ll know what you like and don’t like in a partner and can use that insight for future relationships.

Focus on the present and the future

It’s important to not dwell on the past and focus on what went wrong in the relationship. Do not blame yourself or your ex. Instead, focus on the present and what is yet to come in your future.

Think about your goals and aspirations for the future and how you can work towards achieving them. Remember that it is not a failure to experience heartbreak, but instead an opportunity for growth and self-discovery.

You have a beautiful life to live. Don’t let a breakup hold you back from enjoying it.

Forgive them (and yourself)

It’s important to forgive both your ex and yourself in order to fully move on. Holding onto anger and resentment will only hurt you in the long run. Forgiving them does not mean that you excuse their actions, but rather that you are letting go and freeing yourself from any negative emotions.

Remember that everyone makes mistakes and you are not immune to them, either.

Allow yourself space and time to heal, but keep pushing forward and working towards the life you want for yourself. Your glow up is waiting for you!

Understanding that you deserve happiness

Always remember that you deserve to be happy and loved. Don’t let anyone make you feel otherwise. You are in control of your own happiness, and it is important to love yourself before anyone else can truly love you.

Adopt some new affirmations

Start incorporating positive affirmations into your daily routine. This could be in the form of mantras, quotes, or even just reminding yourself of your worth and important qualities.

Repeating these affirmations will help boost your self-confidence and remind you of your strength during this challenging time.

A couple of examples can be:

“I will get through this.”

“I’m worthy of a healthy relationship.”

“I am strong and capable.”

“I am in control of my own happiness.”

“I am loved and deserving of love.”

Rejection is redirection

When you experience rejection, it can feel like the end of the world. Your heart is broken, your ego bruised, and you may feel like you’ll never love again. But what if I told you that rejection was not a bad thing? That it was actually a sign that you were on the right track?

Rejection is not a bad thing. In fact, it’s quite the opposite. Rejection is redirection. It means that you are heading in the wrong direction and need to course correctly in order to find success.

Every successful person has faced rejection at some point in their life, especially in relationships. They have been told “no” time and time again until they finally heard “yes.” But they didn’t give up when things got tough. They kept going because they knew that success was within reach.

So don’t let rejection get you down. Dust yourself off and keep moving forward. There’s no stopping you now.


Journaling is a great way when you are trying to figure out how to glow up after a breakup. It allows you to process your thoughts and emotions, track your progress, and set goals for yourself. You can also use it as a space to vent and release any pent-up anger or sadness.

Take breaks from social media

It can be tempting to spend hours scrolling through your social media feeds after a breakup, but it’s not going to do much good. It can make things worse. Seeing your ex with someone new can be tough and can send you into a downward spiral.

That’s why it’s important to take breaks from social media and give yourself some time to heal. Trust me, the healing process will go a lot smoother if you aren’t constantly bombarded with images of your ex and their new relationship.


When figuring out how to glow up after a breakup, it’s important to find ways to motivate yourself and push through the tough times. Exercise is a great way to do that. When you’re working out, your endorphins start flowing and you start to feel better. Not only that, but exercise is a great way to release any anger or frustration you may be feeling.

So if you’re struggling to get motivated, try heading to the gym or going for a run. You can even try a workout class that you’ve been eyeing but hasn’t pulled the trigger.

Here are some exercises that you can do to get those endorphins pumping:

– Running

– Weight lifting

– Yoga

– Cycling

– Kickboxing


Set boundaries with others

It’s important to set boundaries with those around you who you feel are not helping you with the healing process. This could be your ex, their family or friends, or even mutual acquaintances. It’s okay to limit or cut off contact with them if it helps you move on and heal.

and it’s okay to ask for space and time to heal without being bombarded with questions or having people constantly bring up the breakup.

Seek out positive relationships

If you feel like the current relationships you have are not positively serving you, seek out new relationships with people who lift you up and support your growth.

Surrounding yourself with positive and uplifting individuals will help in the healing process and can show you that there are people out there who genuinely care about you or may even be going through the same things.

Practice gratitude

When you are trying to figure out how to glow up after a breakup, it’s important to practice gratitude. Even though you are going through a tough time, there are still things to be grateful for.

Think about all the things you have accomplished in your life, even if they seem small. Be proud of yourself for getting through this tough time and remember that you will come out stronger on the other side.

Take some time each day to write down a few things you are grateful for. It could be something as simple as the sun shining or your dog wagging their tail when they see you.

The more you focus on the good things in your life, the more positive energy you will bring into your healing process.

Dress to Impress

You are still a queen and you deserve to glow up. One way to do this is by dressing to impress. Wear your favorite outfit or put on your makeup with intention.

When you feel good about how you look, it will affect the way you feel on the inside as well.

You’ll start to radiate confidence and happiness, and that’s the best glow-up of all. So go ahead and treat yourself to some new clothes, because you deserve them.

Experiment with makeup

One great way to glow up after a breakup is by experimenting with your makeup. Trying new looks can help you feel more confident and happy.

So play around with your makeup. Try out a bold new lip color or experiment with different eye shadow shades.

Create a Vision Board

A vision board can be a great way to visualize your goals and dreams for the future. It can also help you to focus on what you want to achieve in life. After a breakup, it can be especially helpful to create a vision board as a way to visualize your new life.

Make a list of all the things you want for your future. This could include things like finding a new partner, traveling to new places or simply feeling happy and content. Once you have a list of items, find images that represent those things and paste them onto a board or canvas.

Look at your vision board regularly and allow the images and words to inspire you to work towards your goals. When you’re feeling down after a breakup, it can be helpful to look at your vision board and remember that there is a brighter future ahead.

Focus on Your Career

Focusing on your career can be so beneficial when you’re looking to glow up after a breakup. When you’re busy with work and other obligations, you don’t have as much time to dwell on the breakup. You’ll also start to see progress in your career, which can be really motivating.

If you’re feeling lost after a breakup, take some time to assess what you want from your career. Are you interested in pursuing a new job or advancing in your current position? Whatever it is, make a plan of action and start working towards your goals.

Do something that scares you

It can be really helpful to do something that scares you after a breakup. When you’re faced with something new and challenging, you’ll start to feel more confident and capable.

No matter what you choose to do, know that you have the strength and courage to do it.

Go on dates

girl sitting down with boyfriend showing something on his phone

Remember that it’s ok to date again. It may feel scary at first, but it can be a really rewarding experience. When you date someone new, you get to learn about them and experience new things. So go out there and have some fun!

What are some ways you can find some cute dates?

We have an entire article on how to find a guy without online dating

Practice mindfulness

Practicing mindfulness can be a great way to glow up after a break up. This means being present in the moment and focusing on your thoughts and feelings. This can help you to understand yourself better and to deal with your emotions in a healthy way.

There are many ways to practice mindfulness. You can do yoga, meditation or even just take some time each day to focus on your breath. The important thing is to find what works best for you and to stick with it.

When you’re practicing mindfulness, it’s important to be patient. “

It may take some time before you start to see results. But eventually, you will start to feel more at peace and in control of your emotions.

Write who you want to become

After a breakup, it can be helpful to focus on who you want to become. This doesn’t mean forgetting about the past, but rather using it as a way to motivate yourself.

Think about all the things you want for your future. What kind of person do you want to be? Write down all the qualities that come to mind. Then, start working on developing those qualities.

When you’re focused on becoming a better person, you’ll start to glow up from within. You’ll feel more confident and happy with yourself, and that will show in everything you do. So start writing down your goals for the future. It’s time to become the person you’ve always wanted to be.

Understand that you are on your own journey

There is no right or wrong way to deal with a breakup, and you should never compare yourself to others. Every person is different and will heal in their own time and in their own way.

So don’t be hard on yourself if you’re not feeling happy right away.

Don’t feel discouraged when you’re the only single friend out of the group.

Stop thinking about your limiting beliefs

It can be tough to stop thinking about your limiting beliefs. When you’re going through a tough time, it’s natural to doubt yourself and your ability to succeed.

Remind yourself of all your past accomplishments and times when you overcame challenges. And focus on what you want for the future.

Remember that you are capable of anything. You just need to believe in yourself. So don’t let your limiting beliefs hold you back. Focus on your strengths. When you believe in yourself, you will glow up naturally by replacing these negative thoughts with positive ones.

Do not let your ex back into your life

I don’t care what they say, I don’t care that you miss them. Whatever you do, do not let your ex back into your life. If they left you once, they will do it again. And this time, it will hurt even more than before.

Your worth should never be determined by someone else’s actions or words. You deserve to be with someone who treats you with love and respect. So don’t settle for less and don’t let your ex back into your life. You deserve better, and you will find it.

Enjoy the process

When going through something uncomfortable, it’s important to enjoy the process. This means finding joy in the obstacles and challenges that come with growth and change.

Don’t rush to feel better or to “move on.” Instead, embrace every moment of your journey and trust that it will lead you towards happiness.

Don’t give up

I can only imagine the amount of hurt that you have been through and it may feel like it’s impossible to move on. But don’t give up.

You are strong and capable of healing. Just take it one day at a time and know that things will get better. You deserve happiness and love. Never forget that. You got this.

Do it for you and not anyone else

Keep in mind when you are focusing on doing all of this that it’s for you and not for anyone else. It is important to remember that it is about your own growth and happiness, not trying to prove something or make someone else happy.

There’s not “revenge body” no “posting on Instagram so that he can see.” You are doing everything on this list because it makes you and only you happy and you want to see positive change in your life.

So focus on yourself and what will make you the happiest. And remember, YOU are enough just as you are. Keep that in mind during this process and always.

You are only doing this to embrace growth, change and happiness, but not because there was ever anything wrong with you.

When you’ve been in a relationship that didn’t work out, it can be difficult to delete all traces of your ex from your life. This might involve wiping their number from your phone, unfollowing them on social media, or even changing your lock screen photos.

But before you take any of these steps, it’s important to consider why it is you feel the need to disconnect with your ex in this way. Perhaps they have hurt you in some way and you feel the need to hold on to reminders of that pain. Or maybe you simply find it difficult to move past the end of the relationship and are reluctant to let go entirely.

Whatever your reasons for wanting to move on from your ex, it is vital that you take this first step towards healing and letting go.

Removing them from your life will allow you the space and freedom to focus on yourself and rebuild your sense of self outside of the confines of a relationship.

So before you hit delete or unfriend, take a moment to reflect on what led you here and what path lies ahead for you now. With perseverance, honesty, and time, you will find peace once again. And remember – better days are ahead!

Get rid of any reminders of them in your home – photos, gifts, etc.

If you are trying to move on from a relationship and get over your ex, one of the best things you can do is to rid yourself of any reminders of them in your home.

Breaking free from the physical reminders of your past bond can be surprisingly difficult, but it’s crucial for moving on and starting anew. Whether it’s cutting out photos and throwing them away, getting rid of old gifts that remind you of them, or purging your social media accounts, focusing on removing traces from your life can help clear out the mental baggage that you might be holding onto.

So if you’re serious about starting over, don’t hold back – get rid of all those physical reminders and let go of the past once and for all!

Don’t dwell on the past. – focus on moving forward and creating a better future for yourself

If you want to be successful and achieve all of your goals, it is essential that you learn to let go of the past and focus on the present and the future.

After all, dwelling on past mistakes or setbacks will not help you move forward; instead, it will keep you stuck in a cycle of negativity and self-doubt.

To unlock your true potential, you need to look ahead with a clear mind and an open heart. This means focusing on new opportunities, learning to see every setback as an opportunity for growth, and believing in yourself no matter what.

With time, you will learn to channel your energy towards building a better future for yourself – and this is when true success will follow. So don’t get stuck in the past – let go and create the future that you desire!


How long until I glow up after my break up?

It depends. every person is different and everyone grieves a different way. It’s no secret that breakups can be tough.

After all, you are losing not only the person you love but also the routines and memories that you shared together. It can be hard to move on after a breakup, especially if you were not the one who decided to end things.

But it is important to remember, whether it takes you days, weeks or even months, that there is light at the end of the tunnel and to trust the process.

Does your Ex reach out after you’ve glowed up?

Exes have a way of trying to reach out to you when you seem to be doing your best. It’s important to remember that you are in charge of what happens between the two of you, and if your ex is reaching out when you are doing well, it’s a sign that they feel threatened by your progress.

Try to remain strong and focused on your own self-improvement, rather than getting distracted by their attempts at reigniting the relationship. You guys broke up for a reason, respect the signs the universe gave you, and respect yourself.

Is it too late to glow up?

It’s never too late to glow up. No matter what your age or how long you and your significant other have broken up, you have the potential to become a more confident and radiant version of yourself.

All it takes is a little effort and willingness to change. So don’t be discouraged if you feel like you’re behind in the game – everyone has room for growth, and there’s no time like the present to get started. With a bit of dedication, you can become the best possible version of yourself and light up the world with your presence.

Just remember – it’s never too late to glow up!

I feel alone during this process. How can I glow up when I feel like I have no community?

It can be tough to glow up when you feel like you have no community. After all, it’s hard to feel motivated to better yourself when you don’t have anyone to share your journey with.

But don’t worry – there are plenty of ways to find support during your self-improvement journey.

Here are a few ideas:

1) Join an online forum or group specifically for people who are trying to glow up. This can be a great way to connect with others who understand what you’re going through, and you can offer support and advice to one another.

2) Find a friend or family member who is willing to support your goals and be there for you during difficult times. They can provide encouragement and motivation when you need it most.

3) Seek out professional help if you feel like you’re struggling too much on your own.

A therapist or life coach can provide guidance and support as you work through your personal struggles.

No matter how alone you feel, remember that there is always someone out there who wants to see you succeed. Reach out and connect with others, and soon enough, the supportive community that will help light the way will find its way into your life.

Here at Harness, we have a beautiful community of strong, powerful women. You’re more than welcome to join our community and become the force you truly are.

What happens if I do all of these and I don’t feel like I’ve glowed up?

The breakup glow up comes within inside. You have to treat yourself the way you would want others to treat you.

If you feel like you’re doing all of these activities, going out, feeling like you’re stepping out of your comfort zone but don’t feel any different, it’s important to be compassionate with yourself.

Time truly heals all wounds, and it’s important to do these activities for you and only you.

I feel like he’s better off without me. Does he regret leaving?

I understand after a break up you may feel like something is wrong with you, but I can assure you, blaming yourself isn’t going to get you anywhere.

Everything happens for a reason, and whether he regrets leaving or not, do you really want to be without someone that leaves in the first place?

Bottom Line:

After a break-up, it’s important to take some time for yourself to heal and grieve. During that time, it’s also crucial to take steps to remove all traces of your ex from your life. This includes deleting their number, getting rid of photos and gifts, and filling up your time with things that make you happy. By investing in yourself and moving forward with your life, you’ll be able to create a brighter future for yourself. So start fresh – you deserve it. Best of luck on your journey to healing and self-improvement.

Remember – better days are ahead!

And with a little effort and dedication, you’ll be well on your way to finding true happiness and fulfillment. So keep going, and never give up! You got this. 🙂

by Genesis Gutierrez

Genesis is an accomplished entrepreneur, advocate, and coach who has dedicated her career to empowering women around the world. As the CEO of Harness Magazine, a digital media company, she has grown a platform that celebrates and amplifies the voices of women from all walks of life.

A first-generation college graduate with a degree from UCLA and growing up undocumented, Genesis brings a unique perspective and a deep understanding of the challenges that women face in today's world. Her work as a coach has helped countless women find the courage and confidence to pursue their dreams and achieve their goals.

Driven by a passion for social justice and a commitment to building a more equitable and inclusive society, Genesis has become a respected voice in the women's empowerment movement.

Through her work with Harness Magazine and as a coach, Genesis continues to inspire and empower women to take control of their lives and create a brighter, more hopeful future for themselves and for generations to come.

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